Friday, October 17, 2008

Back from the dead

I'm touched that it seems my readers still drop by and I'm missed, and I've wanted to get back into blogging about being childfree, but time and other commitments have gotten in the way. Life is good, and life is still childfree. It’s been the good kind of distraction that’s kept me from this blog, but I think about writing often. It’s time to get back on track, because there IS a lot to write about.

Most importantly, I have not given in to the pressure, as it seems many of you are concerned about. I’ve come out to a couple of stepsisters-in-law, and I can only assume it’s made its way up the ladder. We received fewer (if any) invitations to family functions since then, but considering the way we’ve been made to feel at such events it’s kind of welcome to not have to decline all the time. This year we’re having Thanksgiving with my in-laws, when talk of babies will no doubt be rampant. My husband’s stepbrother’s wife is pregnant with their first child; they were married about a year after we were, so you can imagine where that conversation will head. But overall, everyone’s been pretty mellow with us. We’ll see how that changes at Thanksgiving.

I was laid off in July and I’m so thankful we don’t have a child to support during this time. I’m freelancing regularly, but we’re also facing the loss of my insurance at the end of next month. With the uncertainty of the economy, it’s a scary, scary time, and I can only imagine how scary it is for those who have larger families to support.

J continues to live with us and she has completely turner her life around. It’s magnificent and really inspiring. She credits us for helping her turn her life around and helping to show her what a real relationship looks like. She’s spent the last 3 months with an amazing man who is everything she deserves; they remind me of my husband and me when they’re together. It’s remarkable the transformation, and she concedes that had she met him before living with us she wouldn’t have been the right person for him. I truly believe, even at this early state that she may have found “the One”, but she’s taking things slowly and it’s working out well for them.

As I prepare for an entire weekend spent with my 9-year-old niece, I’m sure I’ll have plenty more insights to share come Monday, and I’m hoping to update more frequently again. Thanks for your dedication, e-mails and comments. I feel touched that as much as this blog has helped me over the years, I’m also helping some of you who feel the same.


Michelle said...

Welcome back! I hope things look up for you.

JJK said...

Phew, thank GAWD you are back! I just found you blog this week, I've been reading through your archives in the meantime hoping you would come back. You put into words everything I want to say but don't know how. I'm also a DINK in chicago and it gives me strength to know there is someone else around here who is like me...I was beginning to feel like I had no choice.

Ken said...

I am glad you are back, too. I recently started blogging about childfree marriage, and I very much appreciated your voice and contributions.

Like everything else, someone who is childfree can be inclusive and positive or just downright mean.

Unlike many other perspectives, however, the childfree know first-hand the attacks that will come when you cut through culture, tradition, and expectation.

How to blend loving acceptance with individual vision, decisiveness, and choice - that is the challenge of the childfree.

Thanks for helping to pave the way.

Amber said...

Yay! I've missed reading you.

Tamara said...

I'm glad you're back. I love being able to read someone who feels the same way I do and who has to deal with the questions and pressure for choosing not to conform.